Mature Masculine
Magician Virtue

Equanimity

Steady in the Storm

"You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength."

Marcus Aurelius

Equanimity

Equanimity is the Magician's capacity to remain balanced regardless of what arises. He neither grasps at pleasure nor pushes away pain. He is neither inflated by success nor deflated by failure.

It is not indifference or emotional flatness. Real equanimity feels everything without being swept away.

Equanimity and the Healer

The Healer archetype works with suffering. Equanimity allows him to stay present instead of drowning in it.

Healthy equanimity in the Healer:

Stays present: Remains with what is, no matter how difficult.

Holds space: Creates stability for others' pain.

Maintains perspective: Sees the bigger picture without minimizing the immediate.

Preserves energy: Conserves resources instead of fighting the unchangeable.

The Healer knows his steadiness is medicine. When he stays calm, others find their own calm.

The Shadows: Charlatan and Wounded Child

When equanimity goes off balance, it twists into the Healer's shadows.

Active Shadow: The Charlatan

Equanimity becomes performance.

Signs of the Charlatan shadow:

  • We fake calm while turmoil churns beneath
  • We use "equanimity" to seem spiritually advanced
  • We suppress emotions and call it balance
  • We keep composure to control others' view

The Charlatan tells himself he's transcended reactivity. Underneath is fear—of appearing weak or losing control.

Passive Shadow: The Wounded Child

Equanimity collapses into reactivity.

Signs of the Wounded Child shadow:

  • We're thrown by every difficulty
  • We can't stay present when others are in pain
  • We absorb emotions without filtering
  • We're destabilized by conflict or criticism

The Wounded Child believes he's caring. Underneath is pain that prevents steadiness with others'.

Near Enemies of Equanimity

Near enemies look similar but come from a different place.

Numbness Disguised as Balance

  • False version: Not feeling because we've shut down
  • True balance: Feeling fully while centered

Test: Are we at peace or checked out?

Indifference Disguised as Non-Attachment

  • False version: Not caring about outcomes
  • True non-attachment: Caring deeply while accepting what we cannot control

Test: Does our equanimity deepen our engagement or decrease it?

Suppression Disguised as Composure

  • False version: Pushing down feelings to look calm
  • True composure: Letting emotions move through without controlling us

Test: Where do our unfelt feelings go?

What True Equanimity Feels Like

Genuine equanimity has distinct qualities:

Spacious: Room for whatever arises.

Grounded: Rooted in stable ground.

Warm: Balance includes compassion, not coldness.

Flexible: We respond as needed without losing center.

Alive: Present and engaged, not withdrawn.

Think of a deep lake. The surface may ripple, but the depths stay still.

Cultivating Equanimity

Develop a Center

Build something stable to return to:

  • What grounds us when life shakes?
  • What restores our balance?

Practice with Small Disturbances

Strengthen capacity with small challenges:

  • Notice minor irritations without reacting
  • Stay present with mild discomfort

This muscle grows with use.

Widen Our Window

Expand what we can hold:

  • Expose ourselves to more intensity, gradually
  • Stay present longer each time

Equanimity grows at our edges.

Remember Impermanence

Everything passes. Difficulty changes. Pleasure fades. Remembering that nothing lasts makes steadiness easier.

Tend Our Own Wounds

Unhealed pain destabilizes:

  • What gets triggered by others' suffering?
  • What healing would help us stay present?

The Healer must heal himself to help others.

The Mature Magician stays steady not because he doesn't feel, but because he has learned to feel without losing himself in it.

Inquiry

  • Where do you lose your center most easily?
  • What do you avoid feeling by maintaining false composure?
  • How do you distinguish genuine equanimity from suppression?
  • What would become possible if you could stay steady in any storm?
  • What is the still point within you that remains unchanged?

Challenges

The Equanimity Inquiry

What disturbs your equanimity most easily? What hooks you into reactivity? What would it take to remain steady in the face of what usually throws you off balance?

The Shadow Check

Is your equanimity genuine balance or is it detachment and numbness? Where does steadiness become indifference? Where does caring become reactivity? What's the integration?

"Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it."

Mahatma Gandhi