Making Agreements

Agreements hold the King's realm together. When people know what they've promised each other, trust builds and work moves forward. Without clear agreements, everything drifts. The Mature King makes agreements that work for everyone at the table.

The Tyrant imposes agreements unilaterally. He makes demands and calls them agreements. The Victim makes agreements he won't keep, saying yes when he means no to avoid conflict. The Mature King negotiates agreements that both parties commit to.

A good agreement has six elements:

Clarity: Both parties understand what is expected. No ambiguity about what was promised.

Mutual benefit: The agreement serves both parties' needs. One-sided agreements breed resentment.

Specificity: Clear about who does what, by when, and how. Vague agreements become broken agreements.

Consequences: Clear about what happens if the agreement breaks. This creates accountability.

Consent: Both parties freely choose to enter. Coerced agreements aren't real agreements.

Flexibility: Room to renegotiate if circumstances change. Life is unpredictable.

When agreements break, trust breaks with them and chaos fills the gap. The King does what he said he'd do and expects the same from others. If something needs to change, he says so out loud and renegotiates. He doesn't just quietly stop showing up.

The King knows when not to make an agreement. He won't agree when he can't keep it, when it doesn't serve the realm, or when the other party negotiates in bad faith. A clear "no" beats a broken "yes."

The process of making an agreement is worth something even before anyone delivers. It makes both people get honest about what they want. It drags hidden disagreements into the light before they turn into real fights. And it gives everyone a shared picture of what "success" looks like.

The King who gets good at making agreements builds a world where a handshake still means something and people can build on each other's word.